Nanny to Mommy

When we think of ‘beauty standards,’ it’s not hard to think of oppressive, unhappy and often limiting criteria that we feel we must meet before we feel our best selves. This is, of course, certainly a wish to fit the ideal, but also a wish to fit the beauty standards proposed to us through marketing, and often, that can be stifling.

It may feel as though we’re free from this once we settle down with a partner, have a baby and become more sure of ourselves, but that’s not always the case, in fact, the very natural and normal process our body has been through can somehow give us cause to feel even more insecure.

Even something as natural and beautiful as having children makes you feel as if you’re somehow a lesser person, there’s obviously something wrong in that equation. For that reason, defining your own beauty standard in motherhood (or at any time) is very important and can help you feel as radiant as you deserve to feel.

Let’s consider how this is possible:

Don’t be afraid to express yourself how you like, that can make all the difference in how you regard yourself and how positive your self-talk is. Expressing yourself may simply mean wearing that dress you have your eye on, trying new jewelry, dying your hair and getting that tattoo, or it might mean dressing less feminine than your peers because you just don’t feel you conform to that. What matters is that you dress unapologetically you, even if that means trying new things.

Don’t be afraid of adornments that help you feel like who you are. This might mean getting your tragus pierced, or it might mean wearing makeup that might be thicker and more powerful than most of the Moms you’re friends with. No matter if you wish for a mommy makeover or you wish to get a sleeve tattoo, no matter if you rock the plus size and feel happy doing so, no matter if you just want to retire to a cottage, wear traditional dresses and feel totally quaint, you can do that, too. Adornments and changes can be a great way to celebrate life, provided you do it with authenticity and care.

Beauty is a fun, temporary, enjoyable indulgence that you can get plenty out of it you don’t take it too seriously. Even the most beautiful person in the world changes their beauty standard as they age, and sometimes, they even look better with wrinkles and with more mature clothing. The beauty ‘standard’ is only ever worthwhile if you hold yourself to a standard of your own making, and that standard should always be ‘what helps me feel my most actualized, healthy, expressive and confident self?’ However, it can also mean ‘what will help me feel good without much effort as I take my children to school this morning?’ In other words, a beauty standard is never a worthwhile standard unless it can conform to the needs of the moment, and unless it’s healthy through and through.

With this advice we hope you can get the best out of your own beauty standards, and define that as appropriate.