Grieving The Loss of an Unborn Child: How to Cope and Move Forward

Having children and building a family is one of the greatest dreams you can ever have. Soon-to- be-parents tend to feel exhilarated and nervous at the same time. They are excited to raise their child because they think it can completely change their life.

But there are instances where sadness suddenly strikes. No one can expect that something in life can shatter their dream. These happenings include losing an unborn child. Losing your child is not a joke because you will feel terrible and helpless.

Losing an unborn child can be a profound and life-altering experience, and it's important to find ways to manage the feelings that come with this loss. Here are some tips that can help you heal and move forward.

1. Allow Some Time to Heal

Losing your unborn child is not easy. You will experience different stages of grief. Therefore, determine your unique need and be kind and gentle towards yourself. Allow yourself to feel other emotions caused by your grief.

Start by acknowledging your pain and avoid pressuring yourself to take away your sadness. You can write it down in your daily journal if you feel different emotions. Grab a pen and paper to vent your feelings further and write your message for your unborn child. If you feel like you can't handle them anymore, take a break from everything and allow yourself to be alone. Feel free to break your routine. Don't be too hard on yourself. Get some time to treat yourself, or if someone offers a treat, though it seems awkward, let it be. Pursue everything that can help you heal.

2. Have an Open Communication

It's important to remember that there is no right or wrong way to grieve and that everyone deals with loss differently.

Talking to family and friends about your feelings can help you cope with the loss of your unborn child. Talking to others who understand what you're going through can be a great source of comfort.

It's essential to communicate with your partner about how you are feeling and what you need from them during this challenging time. This can be a sensitive subject, so be sure to choose a quiet moment when you are both calm and open to having a conversation. Your partner may be grieving differently from you, and it's important to understand their perspective and support each other through this process.

3. Ask for Support

You don't have to go through this emotional time alone. Whether it's through therapy or support groups, it's important to seek guidance from others who understand what you're going through.

You can also ask for help from your ob-gyn and midwifery. Ask them if they know of any loss of pregnancy support. If you prefer mental support, look for a professional counselor and make an appointment.

You can also attend different online forums and be part of online communities that share similar experiences with other stories. Have some guidance from bereaved parents like you. Accept any support from others, especially from friends and relatives.

4. Start Doing Self-Care

It's hard, but you must keep moving forward, especially if you're planning pregnancy again. Start doing self-care. In doing this, get adequate sleep, consume nutritional foods, and exercise. As much as possible, keep your body moving and engage in different athletic and creative endeavors. Do activities and tasks that you can enjoy.

To ensure mindfulness, you can practice meditative breathing and do some yoga and Taichi. You can also read some self-help books that can help you to cope.

All these practices can help you start a new chapter and live a healthy life. But before doing all of these, you must forgive and stop blaming yourself. Start doing self-care one step at a time.

Make a list of your self-care tasks if necessary.

5. Strengthen Your Spirituality

It is essential to strengthen your spirituality. It is the highest form of emotional and mental support you can get. To help you with this, you can practice the following:
- Attend several spiritual gatherings.
- Learn different spiritual wisdom and guidance that can help you guide along the way. These will help you have a solid faith and choose to fight your battles no matter what.


Losing an unborn child can be a difficult and emotional time for both parents. It's important to allow yourself to grieve, communicate with your partner, seek support, practice self-care, and continue to have faith. Everyone grieves differently, but by taking these steps, you can help yourself and your partner find comfort and healing during this challenging time.

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